That was beautiful, dude. Awesome work. Reminds me of when I used to write rock songs. I would love to hear that in a song. if you put it on the site PM me and I'll vote.
-P05t@l268
Sexual lord. Without the sexual. And the lord.
Age 29, Male
Proletarian
Meditation on Cocaine
Portugal
Joined on 5/18/09
That was beautiful, dude. Awesome work. Reminds me of when I used to write rock songs. I would love to hear that in a song. if you put it on the site PM me and I'll vote.
-P05t@l268
Thank you very much, I am glad you liked, I am working on the guitar but I am having some troubles because I want an heavy rythm in there so I am trying to mix heavy and melodic.
Jeffaro
Pretty good writing for a person your age, as far as structure goes.Try being less direct with your lyrics.Try to use more metaphors and stuff that gets the listener to think.Right now your lyrics would just be the equivalent of someone talking.No offense.
Although, I still give you props for having a decent structure.Keep working on your writing.Also, it helps to write the music first and then the lyrics last.Hope I helped a little bit.
TheDaemonicPoet
I have some troubles building metaphors, I am not very creative in that area, I try but I can't always do it... And this lyric is not a romantic lyric at all I am not exactly expressing love for someone, I am telling about how frustrating is expressing love to someone, and how frustrating his love someone and that person don't give a fuck about us, so I can't be too "indirect"...